The New Anxiety Dream

by meghanhorvath

Last night I dreamt I was attending a film festival and running from screen to screen, voraciously watching films. This is how the night manifests my new anxiety, because let’s face it, the first quarter of the year is nearly over and I’ve only watched 35 of my 365-films-this-year goal. If the Sheff Doc Fest and possibly two trans-atlantic Virgin flights were not in my near future, I’d seriously be worried.

One of the reasons I set this belated 2014 goal for myself was that I wanted to see if I could really be this type of person – the one who watches on average a film a day. I’ve met a few in my life already who were accomplishing this feat, and had been for years, but to me it always seemed quite a challenge to clear one’s desk, settle one’s mind, and to truly believe that yes, watching films really IS work and therefore more than a good use of one’s time!

I’ve also been learning more about myself in this process, namely that I break every rule I set. Having first said I’d blog every 25 films I now decided that blogging every 10 is better. Not only does it keep up the momentum but it also keeps the posts (hopefully) more readable.

There were more than a few distractions this past month – a trip to Copenhagen where I presented my film Seduction at a conference on psychoanalysis, a filming reconnaissance trip to Latina, Italy and perhaps more unsettling, hearing: “I’m sorry, today is not the day, Ms. Horvath” at the conclusion of my first attempt at a British driving license (I’ll only reveal why I failed when I manage to pass!). Those words seemed to bounce around my head for quite a few days despite my best attempts at silencing them with Hitchcock’s 39 Steps in the cinema.

So here’s what I’ve watched since my last post:

26. Come As You Are (Hasta La Vista) (Belgian) directed by Geoffrey Enthoven – this was perhaps the most moving of this batch of films. A story of a road trip of three Flemish young men with physical disabilities.

27. Cutie & The Boxer (still on BBC iPlayer), directed by Zachary Heinzerling – I was pulled in by the film’s trailer which was so good while the film felt a little flat in comparison (

28. Nymphomaniac Parts I & II by Lars Von Trier

29. Of Time & City by Terence Davies

30. Tiny Furniture by Lena Davis – The DVD included some of Lena’s earlier shorts. She’s so good even when she’s bad. (Is this unconditional love?)

31. The 39 Steps by Alfred Hitchcock

32. The Five Obstructions by Lars Von Trier with Jørgen Leth – happily watched this at Stansted airport while waiting for my flight to Copenhagen.

33. The Matrix by the Wachowski Brothers

34. Kung-Fu Master! (Le Petit Amour) Directed by Agnès Varda, 1988 – really not the best Varda, but great seeing Birkin and Gainsbourg together

35. I Know Where I’m Going (still on BBC iPlayer) by Powell and Pressburger